Three Classy Gentlemen Review Monster Girls: The Blog Series

Hello there readers of KawaiiPaperPandas. Today marks the first post of a monthly series created by me and some friends. As Interspecies Reviewers is getting a lot of attention so I was like, what fantasy and monster girls do I like. So behold, I created a group of monster girl lovers and we rated what we liked and not liked about them. And talking about these friends, here are their introductions. 


I’m known as Lover of Ahegao. Things I like are ahegao and making lists of three.My interests are traversing the pits of any hentai site, working on the infamous “to watch” list for anime, and playing all manner of games.It’s impossible for me to pick a top waifu, but I will always retweet Ereshkigal or Ishtar art whenever I see it. I love monster girls and could fall asleep to Alipheese Fateburn XVI saying “Hora hora.”Twitter: @LoverOfAhegao


I am the God of Hentai. I love anime, gaming, crafting, cosplay, and Tarot cards.Sailor Jupiter, Nepgear, and best girl Raphtalia. And yeah, I love monster girls.Twitter: @Hentai_God88

So to kick things off we reviewed 5 kinds of waifus. Elves, Mermaids, Werewolves, Slimes, and Centipedes. And we got our information from this nifty site:

Now let’s commence the reviews. 

These ratings will contain sexual content, you have been warned. fa4


Courtesy of the Monster Girl Encyclopedia wiki.)

The more lascivious and dominant of their fair skinned counterparts. Most strong willed men turn into nothing but putty in their hands, and many will return to feel the thrill.

These domineering women are worth seeking out. They exude sexual energy. They are willing to try anything, have the body of a goddess, and wear extremely revealing clothing. Their skills pleasuring others are all but perfected. But unless you are a legendary hero, you’ll be under their heel. I personally enjoy their aggressive nature. I like that they have no restraint in their perversions either. Be it brothel or in the wild though, we are nothing but tools to these women. An easily replaceable semen dispenser. But for any thrill seeker you will not leave disappointed, and will have likely learned something new about yourself. If you want a kinky night with a beautiful woman, look no further than a Dark Elf.

I give these dominatrix a 8/10*.
*Note: Definitely lower because the fantasy of having them as a wife seals your fate as a footstool.

                  -Lover of Ahegao


Elves are natural beauties. Their long life span means that even a girl with a few centuries on her can look young and hot. And of course, they get all the experience that comes with that long life. The only downside is that Elves are often full of themselves. They’re haughty and superior. The hardest part is convincing one to actually sleep with you. But every adventurer knows you need to work for the rarest and most valuable treasures, and an Elf girl is worth the effort. If you can turn the charm up and manage to spend the night with one, you won’t be disappointed.

I rate Elves a 9/10.

                      -God of Hentai


Elf girls are the staple fantasy girls. They are always beautiful, live long lives, and age slowly. They are prideful people and look down on others that aren’t elves. So they are your typical tsundere. And they are quick to recognize lewdness. So if you love hot girls with pointy ears and like being looked down on, elf girls are your thing. 

I rate elf girls 8/10

                     -Tsubaki Kuro

Courtesy of the Monster Girl Encyclopedia wiki.)
The gentle mermaids. In most countries’ lore they wait amidst rocks and sing a song to lure unsuspecting seamen to their welcoming arms. Potentially bringing them ruin.

The ones you will find in your friendly neighborhood brothel are not nearly as potentially destructive. These gentle souls are  much less aggressive than most of their monster sisters. Many can find solace in resting in their arms for the evening and feeling the stress of their day melt away. The girls are quite demure and docile with a man, and are very happy to aid with anything that ails their partner. The attitude changes when sex comes into play. The docile demeanor is shed quickly to take control, and if there’s a connection she will wring any virile man until he’s completely dry. I’m split on intercourse while in the water with these maidens. It’s a gorgeous sight to see the light shining from their vibrant scales as you make love, but managing your air is quite difficult while having sex. At the end of the day it was enjoyable, but I believe mermaids are a better choice for a life partner than becoming a regular at the red light district.

A small feature I noticed that pushes me away from these lovely women is the small amount of foam across their bodies. They are quite similar to fish and will have a similar layer of slime to protect themselves in the water. It makes it harder to enjoy sharing passion, especially outside of water. As someone that enjoys certain tactile sensations a lot less this makes it harder to stay aroused.


A fun fact most don’t know is that they have the naughty bits hidden behind scales in the front. In the end Mermaids are pleasant to have as a partner. Be it a one night stand in the red light, or as a long term partner that you settle down with. 6/10.
Note: Unless you are exceptionally close to the Mermaid, do not ask for her blood. It is a very rare commodity that is said to extend the lifespan of whomever drinks it. It is considered rude to discuss this without a close relationship.

              -Lover of Ahegao


Mermaids are too good to be true. They’re gentle, they’re romantic, aching for a husband. How could anybody say no to that? As a bonus, they’re amazing singers and they can extend your life. And you don’t have to worry about your parts matching up with their fish half. Magic takes care of that problem. If you’re looking for a good wife that will adore you, mermaids are the way to go. The only downside I can think of is that their whole bottom half is a fish tail, so they may not be satisfied if you’re a leg man. But isn’t that a small price to pay for a blushing bride that will do anything to win your heart?

Mermaids get a 10/10 from me.

                   -God of Hentai


Mermaids are the most gentle of all monster girls. Their temperament is the best. They are hopeless romantics and are very beautiful. In water their scales shimmer like beautiful gems. I love them greatly. I was a hopeless romantic back in the day and long for a mermaid bride. They have a bit of slime so that is kind of a turn off but it’s necessary for them to be healthy. And their blood can increase your lifespan to match theirs. Fun fact: they can use their mana to make them hover on land to move. 

I give Mermaids a 9/10

                   -Tsubaki Kuro

(Courtesy of the Monster Girl Encyclopedia wiki.)

The classic puppers of the monster universe. Who doesn’t love a loyal companion? Also one that won’t let your dick get cold. The brothel that I chose for this review was run by a lustful pack and also allows you to select how many of them you want to play with at once.

Werewolves are very straightforward and share parallels with wolves in the wild. They are pack animals, they are fiercely loyal, and have incredible stamina. Trying to be a lone man taking care of the carnal urges of just one of these canine can be overwhelming. Three times will likely not be enough to satisfy, and she will not allow herself to leave disappointed.


The first time to visit is always the harshest. It will likely leave you ravaged and probably walking funny for a day just with all the vigor required to keep pace. Repeated visits though, as the bond grows, sex tends to calm down and your wolf of choice becomes more docile (so long as she isn’t in heat.) The more times you are with them the closer to domesticated dogs they become. That’s something I like about this subsect of girls. She warms your heart as much as your penis. In the end that is exceptionally rare.


Note: If you find a Werewolf in heat it is advised to keep some distance. She will not stop until she is pregnant. And likely some others in her pack are in heat at the same time. One howl can lead to an unfortunate end by multiple partner endless copulation, or glory as the new alpha of the pack. You’ve been warned.

                        -Lover of Ahegao


Werewolves are also quite aggressive. Their strength and endurance could mean you’ll have a hard time satisfying them. Any man who doesn’t feel up to the task would do well to avoid werewolves. However, if you’ve got sexual energy to spare then you might just be able to tame the girls. They become much easier to deal with after that. Though as pack animals, you’ll still have a lot of work ahead of you. The good news is you won’t have to worry about being lonely, and I’m sure trying to please werewolf girls is good exercise.


                     -God of Hentai


Werewolf girls, they are very aggressive and loyal once they take a liking to you. They mate like crazy and it seems very scary. And sometimes they do pack mating, they fight over the male. They kinda rapey. But can be loyal. I prefer cats tho. 

I rate them 4/10

                       -Tsubaki Kuro

The skittering of bugs. Most find this unnerving, and I believe I fall into this category as well. The Oomukade, or Centipede girl, has plenty of charm. She is loving and affectionate. She desires to be with you (even if it is against your wishes.) Many are shy if that is your type. Her body has several ways of delivering an arousing venom, and will leave you ready to go for hours, but can easily leave you in a state of paralysis. She has plenty of leg if you are a leg man.

Many of these women will have markings across their upper body that are actually glands for their venom. Touching them will give a less intense pleasure but can elicit several cute squeaks if you play with them. It is also worth noting that a man’s saliva is actually their largest weakness. Licking these flashy pseudo tattoos or even merely kissing them (above or below,) can leave them reeling.

In the end I can not enjoy these features. As a child I had too many run ins with insects to enjoy their company under any circumstances. My bordello of choice had a lovely woman chosen for me. But most of the evening was spent with me cuddling her from behind to avoid dealing with her insect bits. Easy money for the girl, I suppose.

It hurts my heart as a lover of the perverse, but these girls are just not meant for me.

My personal rating: 2/10.
If I were to not have my phobia? I believe these girls would land at 6/10. The paralysis leaves me feeling a tad too helpless to enjoy myself.

                     -Lover of Ahegao


Centipede girls are highly aggressive, and that’s really not my style. Their poison may have a pleasing effect on men, but you need to get bit or stung for it to work. I’m not a pain for pleasure kind of guy. I prefer a gentler approach. I can’t say I’m a fan of insects either. The upside is that once they have you, they don’t want to let you go. I suppose there’s a certain appeal here, but I’m not the type it applies to.


                      -God of Hentai


Centipede girls are the future. They will reign supreme over all waifus. And sadly I’m the only person who is rating them high. They are a gloomy bunch and can be aggressive. Not as aggressive as the werewolf girls. But will ambush men. But once they like you, they love you. They will get paranoid if you leave them alone and will inject you with a pleasurable poison that immobilizes you. Their poison is safe, I think. Mixing pain with pleasure is a plus on my books. These little gloomy centipedes are also good at cuddling. A fucking +. So if you like a gloomy gf that can cuddle you with many legs and can pleasure you by biting you, give Centipede girls a chance. 

I rate them 10/10

                              -Tsubaki Kuro


(Courtesy of the Monster Girl Encyclopedia wiki.)

The Slime. The quintessential low level enemy for all fledgeling heros-to-be. Not all that dangerous as a whole but a good place to start. These days though slime girls have garnered a new reputation. They are one of the greatest sexual partners a man could ask for.

Slimes are simple and typically docile creatures. They only want your fluids from semen to sweat, and can absorb it from anywhere along their squishy surface. Slimes can change their shape to suit any preference, and are willing to do so to please their partner. They offer unique sexual indulgences like being completely enveloped in their bodies (without the risk of digestion) or using any part of their body as a make-shift  ona hole.

More mature slimes can also alter their density at any spot in their body. So if you like a more solid companion, you can have exactly that. Or if you want them to form something similar to a standard vagina it is possible. If you can think of it your slime companion can scratch that itch.

I won’t lie. Slimes are one of my favorite girls out there. They are not known for being the most intelligent creatures, but they still have great personalities. They are almost always playful and kind. They are happy to be with someone that feeds them and takes care of them. I can not suggest trying an evening with a slime at least once. I doubt you’ll be disappointed.


                           -Lover of Ahegao


Slime girls are amazing. They can change to be just about any body type you want. Once they have you, they will suck you dry as a food source. And their soft, squishy slime bodies feel incredible. You can’t get pleasure like this from any solid creature. The downside is they’re not the most intellectually stimulating companions. You probably can’t expect any meaningful conversation out of them, let alone the possibility of a girlfriend or wife. Still, the sex is good and it helps them survive.


           -God of Hentai


Slime girls are simple minded cuties. Yeah, they ain’t that smart but they can take any shape that you prefer. Plus they are soft as fuck and gives the best pleasure. Plus comes in different colors. They are the staple fantasy enemies that are the cutest. Love them. WARNING: DON’T GIVE THEM WATER

I rate them 9.5/10

                           -Tsubaki Kuro




What girls did you like? Did you rate them the same as us?


3 thoughts on “Three Classy Gentlemen Review Monster Girls: The Blog Series

  1. Reading this was a strange experience and a peak into minds that work completely different than me.
    As grey-sexual (so on the ace spectrum) I had very other thoughts at those pictures.

    Elf: I realy like her hair ornament.. that purple matches her skin tone so well. I just wish she would have more fabric on so I could see more outfit.

    Mermaid: Again with the seashell Bikini.. why would you.. does she kill a little clam to get both halves of one so they are equal in size or to they just get odd shapen onces together. Also why is she so blue. That is a bit bland in design.

    Werewolf: This one is good at combining her colours again.. but that open hip thing feels cheap. She also is kinda dopey looking. I dont think I would a werewolf as a girlfriend because those purple hairs will show really well across my pink and white bedding.

    Centipede girl: Oh why is she crying the poor thing! Maybe I should offer her some tea. That cuddle looks kinda comfey.. I wonder if I took her on a date where could we go.. it’s not like she can sit in a chair. So the movies and resturants are out.. maybe boardgames at my place.. but does she fit there.
    She got three pictures I guess Tsubaki must like her!

    Slime Girl: Poor thing everyone calls her dumb. .. Oh she does that finger thing… why do people like that finger thing?!I dont think dating a slime girl would be good for my outfits… but what if she wants a hug.. I’d probably hug her.. perhaps I can get a poncho! Her boobs are to big though.. but these guys tell me she can make them smaller.

    So I would look at them who I could befriend and maybe non-sexually date. I would go with the centipede girl..she can sting someone else and give them pleasure..but she seems the sweetest.


      1. Well I tend to be someone, who goes for broken girls I can help patch up and give some confidence back.. mostly to be friendzones after but worth it to fix a friend! So I think I could be a match with them.. well at least a not so active one in the wrinkling sheets department..

        Liked by 1 person

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